Love; Sex and the City style
It’s the Thursday after Valentine’s day and I caught myself sitting on my couch watching an old episode of Sex and the City. First off, I love this show. I used to watch it religously. I love Charlotte for her beautiful and well put together self. I have my own inner Carrie…with her love of fashion. I envy Miranda’s intellegence and I’m just in awe of Samantha’s care-free relationship style. I think deep down, we are all a mixutre of these women. That’s why so many of us relate to these character’s on this show.
Anyway, the episode I happened to be watching today was the one where the women were out to there regular girls lunch and they were gossiping about love. Charolette was freshly divorced…and on her new quest for love. During this lunch with her best gal pals, Charolette stated that you only have two great loves in your life. For some reason, this stuck with me. I caught myself whether or not this true? So, I started considering my love life in rewind.
I have definitely loved a lot. But, I believe we all love in different ways as well as being able to love different lovers on different levels. So, as I considered the different men in my life, and the times I have actually been in love, I thought this statement to be true. I think I have definitely only TRUELY loved twice in my lifetime. Once was my highschool sweetheart. He was the first man to ever steal my heart. I loved him…the crazy kind of love, where you would do anything for them as well as put up with all the stupid things they put you through. This relationship taught me so much. It taught me to love again, and be loved seeing as he was the first person I allowed to get close to me since my mother had passed away. This un-named man and I dated for five years. Five years that I cherish because they changed me. They allowed me to learn about love and relationships. They allowed me to know what I wanted in a relationship and they also allowed me to know what I DO NOT want in a relationship. I learned so much about myself on many differnet levels.
One, two…skip a few…there were other relationships after my first love. Some serious and some, well, not so serious. I found myself wanting to explore being single and learning the ways of life. I found myself appreciating my family and friends. I simply found myself experiencing life. I love the memories that I was able to create and all that I was able to experience. We all know I went on The Bachelor and then The Bachelorette. I fell in love, I got my heartbroken, and then fell in love again…only to get my heart broken again. Man, those were a few tough years for me.
Back in the summer of 2009, I found myself on an airplane, on my way back from Greece, and crying on my father’s shoulder. I was crying because I thought I had learned so much about life, love, and relationships and I just couldn’t understand why I was still single. I knew I had so much love to give and desperately wanted to be loved in return. The fear came over me…that I was going to be single forever, that I would never be satisfied or feel confident in a realationship.
My plane landed about nine hours later…back into the United States. I turned my cell phone on like any other normal American, checked my voicemail and was pleasantly surprised to have missed a phone call from a guy I was interested in while I was on vacation. I called him back right away and spent an hour on the phone with no hiccups in the conversation. I had no idea at that point how my life would change but, it did. By October of 2009, I was in love again. This time, the love was different. It was confident love. The kind of love that I knew I didn’t have to prove to anyone else. The kind of love where I found myself being satisfied with just this one man. Life definitely was not perfect but, I was confident in getting through it with just one person by my side for the rest of my life.
Stephen and I dated for just two weeks before I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. By just spending those short 14 days with him, I knew I had found the love that I had always been looking for. The kind of love that changes you. The kind of love that makes all the cliche’s real. The kind of love that makes you realize that you are finally satisfied. So, I agree with Charolette, There are two great loves in one’s lifetime. You may love many times and love in many different ways but, you will only find two loves that will change you within…